Last night I went to Zumba. I have been going regularly for over five years with the same instructor and almost the same group. I love this group. It’s a microcosm of life the way I always envisioned it. There are women of all sizes, shapes, weights, colors, races. There are even deaf-mutes. They feel the vibration of the music. We all have fun.
The first time I went was with a friend who wanted to go to a session at the library. It was downstairs and I thought I wouldn’t be able to do it but when along for the ride. She couldn’t do it and I could. Going upstairs was just the tiniest bit difficult.
The first season I was able to dance in the front. The music and the dancing connect me with my childhood and my mother. As I have said before in my house, we danced! And the music is Caribbean. I feel it in my heart and bones. I was finally old enough and secure enough to just be and do it! At the end of the first year one of the women asked me if I was recovering from a stroke.
I had to change over the years to being by a wall for stability and balance. Then in 2012 I had to start wearing the spectral leg.
Two years ago the venue changed. I had to cross four lanes of traffic without a light. I missed most of the first winter till it became light. Now, I need help. Last year with all the snow and ice, I missed again.
The sessions only run from September to June. I did most of the classes in the fall. December there were only two classes. It started again last week. It’s now in a gym and I forgot the sliders for my shoes. The next session I had hurt my back and couldn’t make it. Last night she started off by playing one of my favorite old songs. This used to be a no brainer. I could barely do it! And then more of the music that sings to me. What’s horrible about this is my mind doesn’t realize I can’t do it. I feel it and then my body is so not doing it. Yesterday, I used our treadmill for 10 minutes and then went to the gym. A newer person told me I was doing great last night. To me I was not.
So, what’s next?
Well, I am back on track pretty much food-wise. Also, amped up the steps so it was a little better.
I am angry. I refuse to continue down a deteriorating path. I am going to fight harder – better food, better exercise, better rest.
My goal? Do a full class by spring.
Keep on dancing!